One second, Dad. MATILDA stares up at her for several long seconds. She holds the hat out to him. She didn't know. MISS HONEY Michael chokes the carrot, while putting baby Matilda in the sink to rinse away spinach, Miss Honey briefly nods yes as she leaves to rescue Matilda from the Chokey, Harry walks down to the kitchen, unaware that his hair has just turned an unhealthy platinum blonde, Michael's mouth drops open in shock upon seeing Harry's hair, walks into the dining room and looks in the mirror, throwing marshmallows as Matilda was grabbing the book that was thrown, the Trunchbull's car, sold to her by Harry Wormwood, has broken down, forcing her to haul it all the way back to her house, Matilda and Miss Honey arrive at Miss Honey's cottage, realizes the Trunchbull is Miss Honey's aunt, Matilda and Miss Honey walk past the Trunchbull's house, as the TV explodes, due to Matilda's powers, looks at Miss Honey and warning the children they were watching us, after smashing the entire cake platter over Bruce Bogtrotter's head, causing the children to stop cheering. ? The entire assembly will stay five hours after school and copy from the dictionary! and look at reading. The subsequent fall was inevitable. MATILDA MATILDA sits down reading a book. Mrs Wormwood, I want you to think very carefully. I'll tell ya, six hours a day of school IS NOT enough. and the great performers would instantly oblige with the most spectacular show, just for them. MATILDA and the ACROBAT'S SISTER [off-stage] I sold it for $2,269. Oh! Oh, yeah? Honest. And people would come from miles around: kings! You fool! Matilda! MRS WORMWOOD and MICHAEL down sit in armchairs. It's true he indulges my tendency to bulge. He screams and turns around, hitting ERIC's cap against ERIC's desk. COUPLE 1 Once upon a time, the two greatest circus performers in the world an escapologist who could escape from any lock that was ever invented, and an acrobat who was so skilled it seemed as if she could actually fly fell in love, and got married. MATILDAThe moved into a beautiful old house at the edge of town, and in the evenings, they would walk and take the air. Dad says I should watch more TV. Zinnia Wormwood: Jane Eyre . MATILDA I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away. Who the hell do they think they are? Harry Wormwood: [walks into the dining room and looks in the mirror] [Miss Honey briefly nods yes as she leaves to rescue Matilda from the Chokey]. You want Matilda to go to college? Let alone getting the conversation going! Michael: Might have been nice, [asked to sign Matilda's adoption papers]. abilities. 2. [He takes out a cigar and takes hold of the baby.] No one's gonna care if you don't care, What have I told you about wearing pigtails? RG0 This is the cottage from your story! BRUCE It was the biggest burp I had ever done. Filthy, nasty things. MATILDA collects the remains of her book. Harry Wormwood: I sold it for $7,839 big American boffo's. You wouldn't listen. [insulted] Now, get out of here, you little stink worm! A spotlight makes its way across the letters on the board, finally settling at the end on the letter Z. Agatha Trunchbull: Right. A DOCTOR enters. You're a liar and a scoundrel, and your father's a liar and a cheat, one of the most corrupt lowlifes in the history of civilization! A weakling? MR WORMWOOD tickles him and MICHAEL laughs suddenly, then falls back into his normal dull expression. Lavender? Every day starts with the tick of a clock. Miss Honey doesn't want you. And that's not right! They're trying to scare us. So, what is it? . I don't know anybody who did. MISS TRUNCHBULL hurries over to AMANDA. MATILDA The more you'll just look like a fool. They say she's going to put me in Chokey! . The Lord of the Rings . WOMAN: And insightful. Agatha Trunchbull: NIGEL and astronauts! . Don't be disgusting! And if you cry it will be (W) double. Imagine what she is going to do to a horrible, squeaky little goblin like you, boy. Girl, you've gotta learn to stand up and stick out from the Try to be funny, or clever, or both! One should avoid confrontation when possible. There's nothing to fear. I'm not in favor of girls getting all clever-pants, Miss Hussy. Why? [He sits down in a zen position.]. Look. And I never understood you, not one little bit Who's got a pen? WOMAN: Well, take another! But Harry's ranting and raving gave Matilda the key to her power. Like Romeo and Juliet, Mr. Wormwood: [COUPLES 13. You'd better hide! Past Alice. Wait, Dad, you're going too fast. Over the course of the song, she writes on the board: "Copy one million times by tomorrow. Is it some modern miracle of calculus . queens! Shut up! That lady? MR WORMWOOD . All escapes start with the click of a lock. Miss Honey, please don't let them Harry Wormwood: What was my profit for the day? Ha, ha, ha, ha Harry Wormwood: Amanda Thripp: I have the adoption papers. My mommy thinks they're sweet. . [to MICHAEL] Get up, boy. MISS HONEY, BIG KIDS, and CHILDREN LAVENDER MR WORMWOOD grabs his suitcase and exits along with the lackey. Her mind? Do you ever lie down at night, look up at the stars and think about all the messed-up things in the world? Matilda: And if it's not right, "I have paid for the posters, publicity, the catering, the toilet facilities. I need to talk to SOMEBODY besides our stupid kids! Miracle! The CHILDREN and BIG KIDS take off their blazers and throw them on top of him. Oh, Matilda, this is very sad! Whee! A little less brains, a lot more hair. There's never been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle as . the Acrobat's sister, a frightening woman who used to be an Olympic-class hammer-thrower, who loved nothing better than to scare the children of the town. I have suffered in this jail. You Have been trapped inside this cage for ages, And I'm very sorry . I will get you like you got me. But nobody else is gonna put it right for me. I slave all day, and you're entertaining a couple of surfer dude bodybuilders! Bruce Bogtrotter: The second one cost $512. Harry Wormwood: Last week, I read quite a few. The most precious gift the natural world can bestow upon us has been handed to you. [he, Zinnia, and Mikey glance at the paper, then at Matilda] Where'd all this come from? . Are you looking for a good amount of pickup lines. MISS HONEY You should be embarrassed. Jenny : Quite the contrary. Write this down. Flashbulbs go off. MATILDA and ACROBAT [off stage]"It is where the loneliness of life has led us.". . COUPLES You gotta give yourself permission to shine. The room freezes as MISS TRUNCHBULL starts to write the word "GUILTY" on the board. One times two is two. CHILDREN MATILDA and ESCAPOLOGIST Maryn Liles Feb 17, 2023 It's no lie that online dating. Ah-ah-aah-ah A spotlight searches the theater. Your hair! . Just knock on the door. Ten times two is twenty. . It's called "Moby Dick", by Herman Melville. A long table with the word "Birthday" emblazoned on it moves forward, with little hands creeping along the bottom. We have everything . RUDOLPHO dances across the back of the stage. Michael: FBI Agent Bob: Oh, my good Lord. Come in, come in, whoever you are. Oh, let's put it this way. [talks to the woman librarian] And therefore, she is guilty! RUDOLPHO whips off MRS WORMWOOD's skirt to reveal a shorter skirt made of tassels beneath it. AAAHH! Spangly ribbons are strung across the stage. The audience gasped so loud that a passing aeroplane caught it on its instrumentation and recorded it as an atmospheric phenomenon. So they say. And if I couldn't teach, I'd have nothing at all. Can't you sell good cars, Dad? I invite you to reply with your own cheesy agent pickup lines, as long as they aren't crossing the line of harassment (actually scrapped a Reyna line for that reason). What am doing here? COUPLE 4 Others take a less emotional approach. A flaming escapologist? Pathetic, little me. Why would you want green hair? . . That such frequent miracles don't render each one un-miraculous? . [:g-] And she keeps trying to tell me stories, Harry. Harry Wormwood: The ESCAPOLOGIST starts to walk in from the back of the stage. In the slip of a bolt, there's a tiny revolt. [He dances backwards and MRS WORMWOOD follows along.]. Like hell! There's nothing you can get from a book that you can't get from a television faster. google_ad_height=90; A little less head, a lot more derriere. DOCTOR Okay! MISS HONEY Look at this. I mean, it's just not normal for a girl to be all . MATILDA Your old man is going to work. endobj I've got a plane to catch at three. MISS TRUNCHBULL [Jenny knocks on Ms. Trunchbull's door] a contract. A shrimp. [Harry walks down to the kitchen, unaware that his hair has just turned an unhealthy platinum blonde] . MATILDA AMANDA . Not yet, anyway. 2022 | Maturity Rating: PG | 1h 56m | Kids & Family Movies. Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it. She stops in triumph. Bambinatum! [She holds her hand out to MATILDA, who takes it.] All right. Don't hide it under a bushel. MATILDA enters from her bedroom. Very supple. There's a place you are sent if you haven't been good. He's going to blow. No, it's a library book! Someone poured a whole can of syrup onto Trunchbull's chair. She then sniffs her way across the room, following the former path of the spotlight. I am GUILTYwhen the Headmistress says I am GUILTY.". MRS WORMWOOD and RUDOLPHO My mummy says I'm a miracle. MR WORMWOOD All grown-ups get scared, just like children. Harry Wormwood: Matilda: Agatha Trunchbull: A girl should think about make-up and hair dye. And yet, every single life, | Share this Matilda : I love it here! Lost your appetite? . I didn't do it. Used to compete in the Olympics, throwing the hammer! in . And I will teach you a thing or two. Miss Honey: The CHILDREN and BIG KIDS step back, leaving AMANDA in a spotlight. I've been trapped inside this (K) cage for ages, MRS WORMWOOD You what? But I . [she shoves Jenny out of her office and slams the door after her]. [She takes MATILDA by the wrist and leads her to ERIC's desk.] MATILDA All I can say is, thank heavens Michael has inherited his old man's brains, eh, son? I'm not guilty! The endings are often a little bit gory! And you may sit and read while I teach the others, and, well, if you have any questions, I shall do my best to answer them. Lovekins, where's my breakfast? Jul 25, - Barney Stinson's Harry Potter pick up lines. Might as well be saying you think that it's okay, I don't believe Matilda's that kind of child at all. Dad said I'd learn the alphabet! We'll wait until she's gone, then we'll go get your doll. MISS TRUNCHBULL Angrily, MISS TRUNCHBULL looks from NIGEL to MATILDA and back. You gotta get up! The group sets off party poppers down the line. We can have our cake and eat it , Ah-ah-aah-ah This is one of the most beautiful children I've ever seen. I did! . Don't put honey on your brother. . Stand out from the crowd! They are good runners, sir. You listen here, my dear, I don't know what you're talking about. Harry Wormwood: Harry Wormwood, owner, founder, whatever. CHILDREN and BIG KIDS appear in the boxes to the upper left and upper right of the stage and sing. 'Cause your life as you know it is ancient history. MISS TRUNCHBULL sniffs and licks the air. DOCTOR Students: I sold it for $999. We give the Whisper Challenge a shot with a little spin on it. And if you cry it will be double. The police decided he killed himself. Her life was good and happy. Like you, I was (Q) curious, My daddy says I'm his special little guy. No. You gotta get up and be loud! 3. It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. MR WORMWOOD . But it's a truth empirical And you won't be getting "right" there, oh no. What am I thinking? You did this! MATILDA MATILDA starts pouring the hair dye into the Oil of Violets bottle. [She flicks the screens off again.] This means that pick-up lines are all about first impressions. Look at you hesitating. Ahh! [she lunges the ball at the door, ultimately puncturing it immensely]. 9. 2 0 obj She then steps forward and hugs MISS HONEY tightly. With a little help from us, she could go to university before she . The announcer from MISS TRUNCHBULL's videos starts commentating. MR WORMWOOD enters with a lackey, who sits on a tyre behind him. MISS HONEY Fifteen times two is thirty. Matilda is a very intelligent and determined young girl appearing in the Roald Dahl children's book of the same name. Two, three, four. What is this, a hot tub party? The apple never rots far from the tree! Agatha Trunchbull: "But we do not have the one thing in the world we want most.". And then, my great, big, beautiful chocolate-y burp, which now seemed to have a mind of its own, wafted full into the face of the Trunchbull! [to his partner] I told you I was supposed to start school in September. MR WORMWOOD exits while MATILDA runs into her bedroom, flings the door open, and climbs onto her bookshelf. Are you being smart with me? Most parents believe their children are the most beautiful creatures ever to grace the planet. Agatha Trunchbull: 2. They're all mistakes, children! Knock on the door, Jenny. I should be dancing the Tarentella "Right"? MRS PHELPS I think you've got something in your eye. Think about what you want to say, and then say it in a creative, original way. Fortunately, almost everything in Christianity is sin. Mum says I'm an angel sent down from the sky! Great, big, strong, scary woman she is. It's going to be brilliant! Did I let myself go. . She taught us with a poem. My father's portrait used to hang there. Young lady, where were you? "tomato"? MATILDA hides the glue behind her back as MR WORMWOOD enters. And so, the great day arrived! There is a spotlight on BRUCE as he begins to talk. Ten! . Agatha Trunchbull: My word is my law! . MISS TRUNCHBULL MATILDA, LAVENDER, and NIGEL raise their hands. NIGEL leans forward in concentration and groans in agony several times. Am I . . It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. DOCTOR If you don't, I will get you. Is she here? Let's leave maths for the time being . Here. If you sit around and let them get on top, you . MISS HONEY You're almost finished. The alphabet? MISS HONEY, dazed, follows the dance as best she can. What're they going to do, repossess the kid? Lights up. Quite a long way, I think. Goofs Did you hear what we said? "It is our destiny ". [as the TV explodes, due to Matilda's powers] And if you want to teach success, My daddy says I'm his special little guy! Behind MR WORMWOOD and MATILDA, the scene changes from a living room to MATILDA's bedroom. My, my, that is good. All grown-ups get scared, just like children. Bruce! We never thought it was possible, MATILDA picks up various bottles from the vanity and reads from their labels. Stood! Agatha Trunchbull: Snickerdoodle, what did you do to your hair? You've gotta learn to listen up, kid. Stop being pathetic, Jenny. Whoa! BRUCE wilts by the desk. ACT 1. With her, it's all "books" and "stories". And . Me, me, me, me. Stand back, son! Yes! Matilda: He'll probably think he's in bed when he wakes up. No kid likes being yelled at, but it was precisely Harry's ranting and raving that gave Matilda the key to her power. One look at my face and it's plain to see. Do you have a job? You're off to school in a few days' time. My mummy says I'm a miracle, But that's not fair! You didn't like the chokey, did you? You and your father think you can make a fool out of me! MRS PHELPS They embrace and exit out the back of the stage. Is it time for school yet, mum? Sell me a lemon? I'll come back later, then. . Hm? RUDOLPHO [Miss Trunchbull has accused Matilda of going into her house]. Every life I bring into this world "Bambinatum est magitum." MRS WORMWOOD Matilda centers on Matilda, a young genius with telekinesis powers. How dare they speak to me like that! My mummy says I'm a miracle. His fingie. And when you scream, you don't know if the sound came out, What can I do? Instead, she's found me. What did you think? RUDOLPHO MISS TRUNCHBULL MR WORMWOOD is having a lot of trouble with the book, even putting his foot on it and pulling at it. If you want to throw the hammer for your country, Harry Wormwood: She'll call a truce, Bruce. You have to force the little squits to toe the line! Secrets. I'm fed up with all this reading! He surely can't! Miss Honey: She misses me so much. Before I first heard the pealing of the bell. Oh, you stupid man. Don't just stand there like a wet tissue. Then get out of town. One hundred and fifty-five brand new luxury cars, sir. . Jenny: That was Miss Honey. Everything was arranged by [She pulls her coat over her head to simulate a hunchback, and grabs a large book.] [picks up two bowls of cereal] Yes. It was the worst of times. [Daintily, straightening her collar, MISS TRUNCHBULL exits off the front of the stage.]. His do-dah. in my opinion, this little girl should be placed in the top form with the eleven-year-olds! Matilda: I can't find his frank 'n' beans! You haven't got time for "but". Harry Wormwood: Are you crying? A book? You have to stay inside the circle . . When I left my home, Aunt Trunchbull's home, I had to leave all my treasures behind. I mean, I know you say you didn't, but obviously, you did. Agatha Trunchbull: You should stay out of trouble, Miss Honey: I stole the cake. in . A single slice, I don't know. I have suffered in this Jail, Anyone with a good sense of humor will appreciate them. She daintily reaches up and captures a figurine of a woman throwing the hammer.]. . That I treated the rules with casual disdain? A denizen of the underworld! All right! MRS PHELPS retreats to the smaller block and sits down. Do we want to do something that rhymes with "truck"? Well, this isn't my room at all! You are going to march in there and give them a piece of your mind. . She puts down the large block and MATILDA stands on it. I shall consign you to the seventh circle of hell, child. MATILDA's classmates enter hesitantly from the front of the stage. 1. YoU listen here, my dear, . Harry Wormwood: It's just that they want that child so very much. How can you be sure unless you have another PIECE? MISS HONEY is left in a pile stage right. Knock on the door, Jenny. They're individual! But I didn't . A purple spotlight starts to make its way from Bruce across the classroom. Please! to the rules. Jack and Jill went up the hill [to MATILDA] You! [realizes the Trunchbull is Miss Honey's aunt], [Matilda and Miss Honey walk past the Trunchbull's house]. . . AAAHH! MAN: Don't put honey on your brother. The gate rolls away. said the wife, smiling sadly and slipping her hand into his. ALL COUPLES: What? MISS HONEY hurries to pull the cap from NIGEL's mouth. . Good-bye, Mrs Phelps. MRS WORMWOOD Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord, 101 Weird & Best Pick Up Lines For Girls (Make Them Laugh!) We've curated this list of inspiring 'Matilda' quotes from the book and the movie. Harry Wormwood: Yes! Parents wheeling strollers enter alongside their CHILDREN. If you're being smart with me, young lady, you're going to be punished. MATILDA collects her books. Psst! You can be all cynical, Matilda: Or - or say you were sued for selling a faulty car. So, starting tomorrow, I shall bring a selection of very clever books that I think will challenge your mind. Narrator: Loud, loud, loud, loud! MRS WORMWOOD [loses it, to Matilda] Zinnia Wormwood: He had meant to say, "When a child is bad." Why? He did what you asked. And even if you put in heaps of effort, Who do you think I am, Miss Honey? The Burning Woman, Hurling Through the Air, with Dynamite in Her Hair, Over Sharks and Spiky Objects, Caught By the Man Locked in a Cage has been . What? If I give the crowd their money back, where is my profit?! Harry Wormwood: The Burning Woman, Hurling Through the Air, with Dynamite in Her Hair, Over Sharks and Spiky Objects, Caught by the Man Locked in a Cage will be performed, and performed this day, or . I'm sorry, doctor. I love it here! [tosses the cereal in the air] Creep on back to that library of yours or something. I've often thought about it, but I can't abandon my children. Before I first heard the Pealing of the bell. When I'm finished with you, you're gonna look like roadkill! You'll be punished so seVerely if you step out of line. I hate pigtails! MISS HONEY Damn girl, I think I need a Parlyz Heal, Because you're stunning. Tricks!" Well, take another! Where's his fingie? Well, then stop her reading! [She throws the baton across the stage, does a jet to catch it, and points her finger at MISS HONEY.] What? . Once in our Cube of Cash, any money that sticks to your gooey body, you get to take home! Come on! . Find the bally line and toe it, Well, I'd better hang around just in case. You've made an awful error. Oliver Twist . Everybody loves a little something exotic. [He rips the towel off to reveal that his hair is green.] You'll never again be subject to abuse for your immense caboose. MRS WORMWOOD . Past Matilda. [looks at Miss Honey and warning the children they were watching us] The moved into a beautiful old house at the edge of town, and in the evenings, they would walk and take the air. Harry Wormwood: . MRS PHELPS enters. MRS PHELPS For each correct answer, they'll move one step closer to our Cube of Cash. Mrs. F-F-I. That is the biggest hug in the world. Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it. . MR WORMWOODOh, my good Lord. Jenny: Agatha Trunchbull: Look at you trying to hide, silly. I . And so you think you're A-ble ESCAPOLOGIST [off-stage] And as time passed, they grew quite old, and still they had no child. Michael: Go on, Brucey! Like you, I was curious, We're rehearsing. But the "tomato" is a very good word. A little less zzz, a lot more zing. They were left out there for the whole world to see because you weren't here to take 'em in! Come on, Bruce, be our hero. Oh, parle Italiano? Dip face! Just because you find that life's not fair, it I think in effect, You don't have to cry, you don't have to shout . MATILDA's brother, MICHAEL, lies lazily on a recliner. MISS TRUNCHBULL MRS PHELPS But even you, Bruce, Agatha Trunchbull: Maybe I shouldn't tell you any more. Gloria Magitum! And I shall crush you. MISS TRUNCHBULL Do I allow pigs in my school? Amanda Thripp: Patience, my love. Amanda Thripp: A little more bah-da, ba ba ba-da bom! They're the bane of my life. As a chalked up my palms, did I wave my hands? Sorry, Miss Trunchbull. Some will grow to be butchers, or bakers, or candlestick makers. Go on, then! Good heavens. Another flaming book? MR WORMWOOD unwraps the blanket that the baby is swathed in. Oops! It's not a cheap set, it's a stolen set! You're just wasting energy, But the one thing . 'Cause you've gotta highlight what you got. . You gotta be loud! My school is a model of discipline! MR WORMWOOD exits. In my class, that is, er, there is a little girl called Matilda Wormwood. NIGEL Because basically a sentence is just a big bunch of words. . [throwing marshmallows as Matilda was grabbing the book that was thrown] ], [She turns and walks back to her desk. The hat rack is taken away. Here's what I think of your lovely [He starts pulling at the book as though to tear it apart.]. Whether you like it or not. You finally matched with someone who feels like a genuine person, exactly your cup of tea, but breaking the ice can be tough for us introverted fellows. Agatha Trunchbull: MATILDA THE MUSICAL. MATILDA That's exactly what you've done. Might she be a little brighter than her class? Harry Wormwood: You have just made a very big mistake. MISS TRUNCHBULL In . 'Cause if you're little, you can do a lot. Back before my life had eNded, You are a teacher. You've not got the spine. The boy's a looney. Michael, pencil and paper, in the kitchen. They line up at the back of the stage. LAVENDER Miss Honey: You have to put it right . <>/ExtGState<>/ProcSet[/PDF/Text/ImageB/ImageC/ImageI] >>/MediaBox[ 0 0 612 792] /Contents 4 0 R/Group<>/Tabs/S/StructParents 0>> See! Above average is average. Even if you're little, you can do a lot. . An idiot? Agatha Trunchbull: Your eyes are like the ocean; I could swim in them all day. Are they good runners? The DOCTOR runs behind the table with the others. Antibiotics, or . He should have thought of that before he made a pact with Satan and decided to steal my cake! MISS HONEY turns and sees MISS TRUNCHBULL watching various video screens playing footage of her Olympic games while an announcer narrates dimly in the background. 8. My mummy says I'm a miracle, Oh, of course. That I'm as tiny and as shiny as a mirror ball. It's very quaint, it's very sweet, MISS HONEY MR WORMWOOD WOMAN: She's just delightful. ESCAPOLOGIST [off-stage] . You seem to think that people like people what are clever. NIGEL, TOMMY MICHAEL gets up and MR WORMWOOD sits down on his recliner. LAVENDER Agatha Trunchbull: You're just wasting enerGy, A contract is a contract is a contract! BIG KIDS and CHILDREN run off. I'll come in there and pound your miserable hide! BIG KID [TAMIKA] Marvellous. Miss Jennifer 'Jenny' Honey: Matilda, you promised you wouldn't go back into that house. Even if you're little, you can do a lot. "We have everything that the world has to offer," said the wife. MISS TRUNCHBULL takes BRUCE by the wrist and leads him off the front of the stage. [into recorder] Harry Wormwood: [as Harry switches on Matilda's lamp] Now, can anyone read this? MATILDA MRS PHELPS is sitting on a block and MATILDA is standing on one, holding the two dolls. MISS TRUNCHBULL's office, complete with her in a high-backed chair (facing the back of the stage) is wheeled in. MRS WORMWOOD Matilda's teacher? Cute pick-up lines can help you get past the awkwardness of meeting someone for the first time. google_color_link="000000"; MRS WORMWOOD And this . What was my profit for the day? I warn you, sir, I want a tight car, because I run a tight ship. The first car your brilliant father sold cost $320. ACROBAT [off-stage] We don't want to burst a blood vessel on your first day. Rudolpho! MRS WORMWOOD puts a number on RUDOLPHO's back as though they are competing in a dancing competition. Are you listening? Get out of it! If I were a cat I'd spend all 9 lives with you. Then your mummy is a twit! What's this? Good-bye, Mrs Phelps. Miss Trunchbull, I was the one who was at your house last night, and I think Agatha Trunchbull: MRS WORMWOOD Miss Honey: Bruce! Hanging down by your ears. Matilda Wormwood: I wonder what Miss Trunchbull is afraid of. Zinnia Wormwood: Take hints from the ideas to charm and impress her with your words during your first meeting. Matilda? It was the age of wisdom . Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you. MRS WORMWOOD What on earth did you do that for? I think you'll want your trousers loose. And instead of a musical fanfare, there was silence, as he solemnly strode into the room. MAN: So hilarious. The cook enters, holding an enormous chocolate cake on a tray, along with a wooden spoon. I'm not crying because it's sad. Thank you for suggesting it. . Is there still time for the Bi-Annual Inter-Championship Amateur Sausage . Now get out. cancelled! Bruce! I can! In a manner of speaking, yes. Written by Trunchbull on the blackboard: Yourself, Matilda? I didn't go to college. A person. The CHILDREN enter from both sides of the stage, with lab coats over their costumes. Don't let her win. Oh, my word, he's an ugly little thing. [She murmurs along to the music.] Won't change a thing. These are some of the best quotes from the fantasy family film Matilda as determined by you and your votes. Well, I'll pay you back, young lady. Yeah, I got a boy, Mikey, and one mis-*take*, Matilda. MISS TRUNCHBULL We're not rich. The initial impression you make is memorable, so make it count. [Looking irritated, she makes her way to BRUCE's side.] It's not mine! You have a worm, Starring: Alisha Weir, Emma Thompson, Lashana Lynch. Tell me anywhere you'd like to go on a date. . Harry Wormwood: The secret to my success is this. Harry Wormwood: Not dressed in hospital cotton, I am off to bleach my roots . [to Michael] A beautiful, beautiful little girl. BRUCE Dance competition's over. He drops it again. I'm never wrong! You will soon see there's no escaping tragedy. Not the end of your nose. Meet Matilda. DOCTOR What am I gonna do? And sailed high up, up above the stands One look at my face and it's plain to see. We can spell "difficulty". . But I shan't enjoy it, because of the despicable way in which you have spoken to me tonight. MATILDA Eleven times two is twenty-two. But I think it's good for grown-ups to have their own space. I should be wearing in the semi-finals tonight! Matilda: You should read it. MR WORMWOOD Miss Trunchbull kept the whole school late because this boy ate some chocolate cake. Oh, no, Matilda. Agatha Trunchbull: 2. That's where Ms. Trunchbull lives. How can I make up my own pickup line? ACROBAT and ESCAPOLOGIST [off-stage] I am FULLwhen and onlywhen the Headmistress says I am FULL. It was like the entire world went silent for that Even if what you got is not a lot. Desks rise from the ground and a blackboard makes its way from the back of the stage. And my very favorite is a spoonful of Nutella. MRS WORMWOOD
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